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Blueballed4life
Newbie
Posts: 6
Registered: 06-21-2006 Location:
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posted on 06-21-2006 at 13:48 |
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Dedicated Celibacy and Ways to Stick with it
Is anyone else on here a dedicated celibate? I am. Not for any religious reasons. I've been classified as a cypridophobic, which is a person with a chronic fear of veneral disease (and prostitutes, but I've never even considered going to one of them!).
So for health reasons, I've declared myself an eternal virgin. But that doesn't mean you can't lead a productive sex life! The urges don't go away.
There's masturbation, of course. Sometimes I do it the way everyone else does - with three condoms on my penis and two layers of surgeon's plastic gloves. Images of the Olson Twins really do it for me. They're 18 now and still pure as their Full House days! There is nothing wrong with this.
I also like to put a cantaloupe in the microwave for 4 minutes. It gets nice and soft. Then you carve a hole in it, put on three condoms and do what they do in that American Pie movie. It's nice! I don't know if it feels like a vagina, but I wouldn't want to know anyway. Vaginas are the festering source of all disease! I can't bear to think of them when masturbating. I think of angels or the Olsen twins or the fresh scent of my mother's bran muffins.
Does anyone else have any interesting ways to relieve yourself?
Serious responses only please!!
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BloodNinja
Newbie
Posts: 5
Registered: 06-21-2006 Location:
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posted on 06-21-2006 at 14:17 |
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Choice?
so you're celebate by choice? couldn't you use a condom? I'd love to have that choice, I'm just not what one calls a ladies man.
It is tough, but I really try to talk to females. I am just a nervous wreck and am not really up to speed on new fashion trends and stuff so I am labeled a geek and such.
To add to it, I am a programmer, so I get alot of ribbing for that as well. There are few women that work with us, so I can't get much advice and my mom is no help at home in that regard.
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igor
Junior Member
Posts: 14
Registered: 06-01-2005 Location:
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posted on 07-11-2006 at 13:16 |
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no sex?
My, my, you do have a problem. I suggest you get counselling. WHy do you even use condoms when masturbating? Do you think you'll catch something from your hand?
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